Everything is just perfect, where everything is positioned, the matching colors of both the desk and bed are just right. The light brown varnish of both the bed and the table is appealing to the eye. The light khaki color of the mattress suits the light brown and creates a nice harmony of colors. First of all the pillow matches the blanket as they are both checkered and both light blue and green and white. Also the room color supports this match as the floor is beige, brown varnish. Since there are no exotic colors, we aren't burdened by the different colors and it is just suitable and comfortable.
I would like to call my bed at GLPS "heaven" as the colors are simple so we can rest, but the most important factor is that everything (the pillow, mattress and blanket) are all comfortable. Therefore, just sleeping there at night feels comfortable and I instantly fall asleep when I am lying in my bed. I would also like to call the feeling whilst laying in my bed the warmth of the clouds or the softness of the clouds. The pillows, mattress and blanket are so soft that I just sink into it and the blanket just feels so soft. Due to the fact that I feel like I am lying on clouds or being surrounded by clouds I want to call this feeling of being in heaven.
In my previous paragraphs I have indicated that my bed is like heaven, I would like to call the staircase to my bed, the "staircase to heaven". As it helps me get up to my bed "or heaven" therefore it is called the staircase to heaven. Also the steps are just the right height so we don't have to make our strides bigger or smaller with each step. So our basic stance when walking is fine. I am a free thinker, I am not using the word "heaven" in a religious way, but I just think that it will be the best way to describe my bed at GLPS. It helps me relive my stress and fatigue after a long day.
Hi, I'm your writing TA Sintae. I am impressed by your descriptive writing. It is always good to have details. However even though you described well about how you feel about your bed, I thought that you could make it more like an ode by taking the format of a letter. It would help you to be more personal in your writing, and you can use some metaphor as well.
ReplyDeleteOverall, good job!
This almost sounds sarcastic. Most students complain about the beds here. As Shintae says, the writing is good, but doesn't really meet the poetic intent of the exercise. Challenge yourself more.
ReplyDeleteI have been keeping an eye on your work:) I hope you will post a new piece soon, since I haven't seen one in a while. The above essay was quite impressive, because as Mr. Garrioch has said, the beds at KMLA are infamous. But I'm glad you like them.
ReplyDelete